Little things can go along way.

Popular people do better at work. They are more fun to have around, generate a positive atmosphere and improve morale. And as a manager being asked for a pay rise, wouldn’t you be more sympathetic towards someone you liked? So if you’re less popular than you could be, take a look through this list of likeable characteristics and see where there’s room for improvement.

• Be a good listener.
• Show an interest in the people around you.
• Don’t be arrogant or pompous.
• Don’t gossip about people behind their backs.
• Never put people down.
• A strong sense of humor is a definite plus, but don’t use it against the people you work with.
• If you manage your own team, be fair and always make time when your team members need to talk to you.

None of this is difficult, but most of us know deep down that we don’t really listen properly, or that when we disagree with someone’s idea we sometimes put them down (‘That’s a stupid idea!’ rather than ‘I disagree’).

Trust and Reliability
You are bound to succeed better if you are regarded as being trustworthy and reliable. So make sure you never break confidences or act disloyally, for example by gossiping about colleagues to customers or suppliers. Equally, always show you can be trusted to get tasks done, especially when they are urgent or important. Show that even when delays have put you behind, you can still get the work done without mistakes. That means that when there’s a sense of panic, your boss will decide to put you in charge of vital projects – you can be trusted to make sure it all runs smoothly. That’ll give you a few feathers in your cap when you come to ask for your rise or promotion.

Open Up

People who are open and honest tend to be seen as more trustworthy than those who are private or secretive. It’s not really fair most of the time, but that’s the way it is. If you are a private person, try to be a little more forthcoming about yourself – you’ll find it helps your image. You don’t have to bare your soul; just join in talking about your holiday or discussing your favorite music, or tell the odd anecdote about when you were a child.

You have settled on the best month or couple of weeks in which to ask for your pay rise, promotion or whatever.

When is the right time to ask?

 Now the time has come to fix up a specific meeting with your boss. You might have been expecting to settle this whole thing over an informal chat or a drink together after work. But in fact you are far better off fixing up a formal meeting with the boss. The more professional format gives you several advantages:

• It signals that you are serious about this – you’re not just asking because it’s ‘worth a try’.
• It gives you the opportunity to make a proper presentation to your boss, laying out all the arguments in your favor carefully. This can be quite difficult in a crowded pub, and in any case feels uncomfortable in an informal setting.
• A formal meeting should mean dosed doors, phones diverted and no interruptions – far more conducive to getting your boss to focus on the subject.
• Your boss will set aside time for a formal meeting which they might not for an informal chat. This means they shouldn’t be constantly looking at their watch and itching to get off to their next appointment.
• A formal meeting gives you an excuse to jot down the key points made and copy it to your boss later (whereas it’s hardly common practice to minute your lunchtime trip to the pub).

So how are you going to ask? You may feel that your boss will resist the suggestion of a pay rise and that you don’t want to announce in advance that this is the reason you’d like to meet. You can perfectly well ask for a meeting in order to discuss your work and leave it at that. If they ask you for more detail, explain that you want to talk about your performance and perhaps mention that you want to review your overall compensation package. You certainly won’t need to be more specific than that.

Don’t Jump the Gun
It’s possible that your boss will agree to meet and will suggest a time in the next day or two – maybe their diary is full all next week and then they’re off on a conference. If you haven’t prepared your case fully yet, you’re going to be in trouble. So don’t ask for a meeting until you’re ready for it.

Know what your worth!

How far are you going to let your boss beat you down before you come out feeling like a loser? You have to go into this negotiation knowing what is the least you are prepared to settle for. Otherwise you may come out with nothing. It’s no good saying, ‘Can I have a pay rise please?’ and then, when your boss declines, saying, ‘Oh well, it was worth a try’, and leaving.

It’s up to you to decide what your bottom line is. Maybe your personal expenses have increased and you need to get a minimum pay rise to cover them. Or perhaps you simply feel that you don’t want to work for an organization that won’t recognize your worth. Maybe you want a bare minimum of a 20 per cent rise, or perhaps you’d settle for an undertaking to give you a rise in six months if you reach an agreed performance target. Your bottom line may be well below the figure you’re really aiming for, or it may be the same figure.

The important thing is to know your bottom line and then stick to it. And, of course, decide what you’ll do if your boss refuses even that much (although if you’re realistic, you’ve done your homework, you’re worth more than you’re paid and you negotiate competently, there’s no reason for your boss to refuse it). If you’re not ready to hold out for the bottom-line figure, there’s little point in negotiating. If you don’t hold firm you might as well just say ‘How about it?’ to your boss on the off-chance they up your salary without argument.

By the way, whatever you do, don’t give away what your bottom line is. ‘It’s for you to know and them to find out’, as they say. At least, let them think they’ve found out by beating you down to it. But if you’re canny, they won’t ever haggle you down that far. If your boss finds out what your bottom line is, they won’t stop until they’ve ground you down to it. So don’t let them find out until they reach it. At that point you can, if you wish, say ‘That’s my absolute bottom line’.

And don’t, whatever you do, cry wolf. If you insist you’ve reached your bottom line and then subsequently agree to drop below it, your boss will quite reasonably disbelieve you when you finally claim – truthfully – that yet another figure really is your bottom line. And if they don’t believe you, they’ll keep trying to batter you down and the pair of you may never reach an agreement that works for you both.

Leverage? What Leverage?
You might be thinking that you have nothing to negotiate with unless you’re prepared to hand in your notice. If you’re not, all your boss has to do is flatly refuse any rise, and that’s that. Not so. You’re here because you are worth more than you’re being paid. That extra value is your leverage. We’ve seen that threats don’t work, but you can always find other ways of phrasing the point you’re making. For example: ‘I feel I’m worth more than I’m earning because of all the extra hours I put in. If those extra hours weren’t going to be rewarded, I would have to ask myself why I work them.’ You’re not threatening to work to rule, but your boss can see that you have bargaining counters too.